The Morning After: June 11, 2009
Good Thursday morning. Does anybody else feel disoriented? I feel like this has been an unusually long week already. Part of it may have something to do with the unfortunate events of Tuesday night. You may or may not have noticed that I didn’t really say anything yesterday regarding the Magic’s win over the Lakers…that’s because I missed the entire game and postgame. You see, I was outside digging up my beautiful flower bed trying to locate an elusive sewer line cleanout to allow the water to drain from two backed up toilets and a half-full bathtub. We never found the cleanout and the very cheery (/sarcasm) plumber drilled a hole in our sewer line to alleviate the problem.
A couple of dead shrubs and about 25 mosquito bites later, I was able to crawl into bed sometime very early Wednesday morning with full confidence that we were back in business…except for my once-pretty flower bed. Oh, and some tips for you homeowners out there, go with Angel Soft, not Charmin. Apparently, Charmin is notorious among plumbers for being a common culprit in clogging the crap out of sewer lines (/pun fully intended). By the way, that advice was free of charge. That’s the kind of excellence you get when I do TMA.
On to the links…
US Representative Steve Cohen (D-Tenn) keeps flapping his gums about challenging the NBA’s age rules. Now, he’s dragging poor ol’ Thadeus Young and The Ramblin’ Wreck into his mess.
If there was ever a time to have a 55-hour erection, prison is not it.
I had a wise old buddy that used to call me Ray, for some odd reason. Anywho, he told me this one time:
The one constant through all the years, Ray, has been baseball. America has rolled by like an army of steamrollers. It has been erased like a blackboard, rebuilt and erased again. But baseball has marked the time. This field, this game: it’s a part of our past, Ray. It reminds of us of all that once was good and it could be again.
We were eating burritos at Moe’s so I had no idea what he was talking about until I read this heartwarming story about baseball playing on despite hard times.
Stephen Hawking is only as smart as a toddler…sounds like an interesting subject for a gameshow. Maybe Jeff Foxworthy could host it?
Everyone’s favorite greasefire golfer, John Daly, failed to qualify for the US Open but will be taking up residence this week in Memphis for the St. Jude Classic. Don’t worry though; even though he’s attempting to clean himself up, drama still follows close behind. Oh, and the restraining order that was mentioned in the second link, a judge granted it yesterday.
The Bills’ Corey McIntyre has been cleared of the “exposing and fondling himself” charges.
The unemployment rate for cats is a staggering 100%. This down economy sure is hitting all comers.
Mikey Vick has someone in his corner, his old coach, Jim Mora. By the way, did the Redskins really consider signing him?
Guess who lost to the Red Socks last night…again…for the 7th time this season. If you guessed the Yankees, you’d be right.
Anybody headed to Bonnaroo this weekend? If so, brace yourself for the traffic.
Gil Arenas lost 20 el beez…so he either has a tapeworm or is off the roids.
Looks like the A-Rod tell-all book by the Duke Lacrosse jump-to-conclusions-lady is not doing so well.
An all-American cheater fittingly loses to an all-American hero.
The arrest numbers don’t tell the full story? Oh, puhlEEEEEEEASE!
D-Wade is suing an ex bizness partner for $100M. Needless to say, that’s a sizeable chunk of change.
The housing market is making Dan Marino a desperate seller.
The Steelers latest Ring may have upwards of 63 diamonds.
Kobe’s middle school pics.
I hope you all have a great day. And, remember, Angel Soft…not Charmin.
Mizerle06 is a senior writer, editor, and sometimes copy-editor at Sparty & Friends. Feel free to drop him a lin at mizerle@spartyandfriends.com.
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miz is a ghey redneck.
/nttawwt.
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have I told you yet today that I hate you?
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I prefer sandpaper, keeps me on my toes
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should keep your pipes running smoothly I guess.
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Don’t forget to guess who is in second place in the AL East now.
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This never would have happened if you had renewed your subscription to Guns and Gardens magazine.
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kwsn – how do you think I got it looking so good in the first place?
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I think Sparty already covered that.
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+1 to kwsn
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Huh, I hit quote on Sparty’s comment and it made it say mizerle06 somehow. That’s interesting.
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strange.
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yeah, I noticed that. good work on making it look like I outed myself.
/I didn’t.
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Put my Game 3 pics on Facebook…fave pic. Apparently the one of sparty on the big screen didn’t come out and I didn’t notice when I took it…oh well.
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rek, was it of Leonidas?
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sparty–Sure was. There was also a guy outside wearing a Wings jersey that I neglected to take a pic of…that could’ve been you too.
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Riley to Cavs?
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I know a couple of people who had to have their septic systems pumped out because of Charmin. Real men don’t use that fluffy toilet paper in any event.
I have problems with the main line going to my septic system. Need to get that fixed sometime soon.
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Did anyone else read the prison piece? The guy who suffered the 55 hour erection was named Dawud? Da Wood?
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